How often do you hear the phrase “you never listen to me” tossed around? That’s because listening has become something that a lot of people fail to do well. By failing to listen, we don’t connect with other people as deeply as we should.
One of the reasons why we fail to listen to people is because we fail to listen to ourselves. We’re so busy and so distracted that it’s easy to get lost inside our own heads and constantly move on to the next thought, the next task, and the next person.
But mindfulness can help you achieve the place where you can learn how to listen. When you fail to listen to other people, part of the problem can be because you have something that you need or that you want to say to the other person.
Your mind is busy formulating how you feel about the conversation. If you’re someone who struggles to listen well, one of the key symptoms of this trait is if you cut people off as they’re talking.
Another sign is if you’ve already decided what to say while the person is still in the middle of speaking. You’re more focused on being heard than you are listening. Mindful listening involves not allowing yourself to have a preformed opinion of what the other person is saying before they finish what they’re saying.
It means paying attention to their words, their emotions and trying to understand the other person. When you listen mindfully, it lets the other person feel safe enough to express what they’re thinking and feeling because they know they’re going to be heard.
Someone who is able to be a mindful listener first learns how to focus within himself. To listen mindfully means that you tune in to yourself first and then you’re able to hear others as they need to be heard.
Mindfulness allows you to be a more receptive listener and it allows you to show more support for the other person. When you’re a mindful listener, it means that you keep your focus on the conversation without reacting.
You keep control over your thoughts by not pre-judging the other person’s intent before you’ve even had a chance to hear them out. Mindfulness also helps you to keep your emotion focused on the present with the person you’re speaking with.
This is especially helpful when you’re talking to someone that you’ve had issues with in the past. When you learn the art of mindfulness, it allows you to first self-focus so that you’re able to focus on others.
By understanding yourself, you can be more genuine with other people. There are many benefits to being a mindful listener. When you do, you’ll find that people appreciate you more both in your private life and in your professional life.
You’ll be able to motivate people and handle conflict more effectively. You’ll also be able to handle the stress more effectively that can occur when you’re dealing with people that it’s hard to communicate with.
Mindful listening will help you be able to clarify what you’ve heard so there is less miscommunication at home and at work.